“I feel so tired of everything”

I can’t talk to my friends about my problems because then they call me an attention seeker, say my issues are petty and trivial, they then think of me in a negative way and it makes them want to talk to me less in general, or they simply don’t react to my cries for help because it’s too draining. I know they can’t be my personal therapists but I just need somebody to be on my side with things.


Hey friend, I hear you.

This is the exact moment where change can happen. When you’ve completely tapped out all the empathy other people can show you, when you’ve talked to everyone you could, when you feel all alone, exhausted, terrified – that’s the exact moment you can turn inwards and find that you are capable of self-empathy.

We all are, we’ve just never been taught that it’s possible. No one’s ever told us that the softest hug, the kindest words, the deepest compassion and the sweetest medicine for our pain always resides within us, right next to it. The more we suffer, the more compassion to ourselves we have, hiding just under the surface, right under our self judgement.

If you look inside, you’ll see a frightened and lonely child, sitting by herself, in the dark, waiting for someone to be with her. That child is you, but you are no longer her. You’ve grown and you can now give her what she could never get from anyone else. You can sit with her, listen to her, hug her, play with her. Give her the attention she always craved for.

Cry with her.

This can be a beginning of a wonderful journey to peace, to love, to emotional self sufficiency. Sharing your pain with your boyfriend and with your friends becomes much easier once you find a way to first take a stab at it yourself. You won’t come off as needy or dependent anymore. On the contrary, you’ll radiate strength, compassions and vulnerability and people will naturally gravitate towards you.

Follow me @finereli where I write about emotional intelligence and mental health.